I’m fast becoming isolated, I’ve zero self confidence and my self esteem has taken a nose dive, a combination of truly looking into the mirror for once and a mystery illness.
And there is absolutely nothing wrong with being a late-bloomer, or in delaying romance and sex until you meet the right person or feel ready.
I know it’s a bummer to get crushes on people who are already coupled up, but you are sparking with people!
It will feel like “” The fact that you have lots of female friends is also an encouraging sign. So let’s talk about some stuff you can do differently to improve your life and your chances of meeting someone you’d like to be with.
While I think you have some particular cultural stuff you’re also trying to sort out, my advice to young straight men who want to meet women is always going to be about subverting the dominant dating paradigm and the sexist culture we grow up with, and it’s always gonna run along the same lines: 1) Read books & blogs, watch films, look at art, and listen to music made by women.
This means that you are recognizing what you like in a person, and learning more about who you are really attracted to.
This will serve you well when you meet someone who is single and who has the qualities you like.
Not every work created by a woman goes against this grain, obviously, since we’re all swimming in the same cultural soup. Check things off, or join a social site like Goodreads.
And hopefully you already seek out and enjoy works by women — I don’t want to insult you by saying that you don’t or that you are unaware! Reason #2: It will be fun and you’ll encounter some really good stuff you might not have sought out otherwise.
Use woman-created media to to remind yourself that the world isn’t only about you men women who have/have not rejected you as a romantic partner. Reason #4: If you ask the women you know for recommendations of books and movies they love, they will flock to this project. Have you looked into clubs, classes, volunteering, Meet Ups?
If you meet a woman, and you kind of like her, and you are looking for something to talk about, try asking her “ If you listen to her, and then go and read or watch that thing, she may or may not date you in the end, but you will get infinity coolness points because this behavior by men is sadly all too rare. This is as close as I ever get to the #1 SEEKRIT TRICK TO IMPRESS GIRLS kind of advice-giving. Some cool places to meet lots of nice people are: From how you describe yourself: Intense, intelligent, good at arguing, passionate about certain things that no one else likes, I am going to make an inference that you are very smart, quick-witted, and you like to be good at stuff and impress people.
Before all that happened, I was an incredible jerk, an arrogant piece of shit with an intellect to match and zero attachments to anyone.